Working for 2 months now, nothing had been so easy for me. Especially when my sciences background meets my current banking job. Its out of the world. But anyhow I'm trying my best to adapt with the new rhythm in my life.

I have to say, the supervisors might be quite 'kerek' at a time. Some are ok. Somehow I have to bare with the kerekness of these few numbers. Thats how working life works, I suppose.

And I realize, knowing someone who at a certain level of organization might affect other people's perception/reaction towards you. For example, one of the 'kerek' supervisor enquire me on my father's job. Well, I told her that he's working in HQ. At first she had a sceptic look at me, then i told her bout the incident that occured almost 3 years ago. She had a disbelieve in her face, and she asked what's my father's position in HQ... perhaps she thought my father is just a normal officer. My answer was short... but enough to make her choke.

And today, I realized she'd been so obvious nice to me. No more shouting, when ever I need an assistant on something she would guide me with TLC. Hahhaha... damn blardy office politics~!

=Trust me, I would never misused my family background.=

p.s: I wonder, the other 'kerek' supervisors... especially the one who had 'maki' me infront hundreds of people the other day... if they get the same info like the former 'kerek' supervisor, they'll be sorry for treating me like shit. =)

courtessy of Abe We again.

milah berjalan penuh gaya catwalk persis tyra banks. panas mentari begitu terik. renik-renik peluh mula membasahi muka milah yang gebu itu. alamak, abisla foundation yang den lotak tadi! karang tak cun lak den?abih la tittle primadona kampung den! pikir milah sedikit gundah. "opocot omak kau! terkojut den!". berderau darah milah tiba2 bapak kambing separa hensem melintas di depannya. tersengih2 bapak kambing tersebut kepada milah. di satu sudut, milah terpandang seseorang sedang melayan blues. matanya merah. ada pilu di wajahnya.

"asalamualaikum" sapa milah lembut. "Oh, milah.." jawab suara itu lemah umpama 3 hari tak makan. " err..apo kak bungo cinto lestari buek kek sini? jauh bonar akak termonung? macam bermasalah jo?" sob sob sob, tangisan kak bunga makin kuat.beberapa ketika sendunya tertahan. diambil hujung baju kurung sambil mengesat air mata yang mengalir (ala2 neng yatimah menangis daa). "kenapo kak? boleh den tolong? akak sedih sobab Mc Cain kalah dengan Obama ko?" tanya milah ikhlas.

sambil tuturnya tertahan2 kak bunga berkata, "gilo apo ekau nih? tetibo cerito pasal obama lak! sob sob sob....abang ashraf sinclair ekau nak kawin lagi satuuuuu..uwaaaa" tangisannya makin menjadi2. milah jadi gelabah. uishhh meroyan pulak akak sorang nih. "sabar kak. botul ko berito sensasi ni? tak kuar melodi pun?". " betul milah, akak dongar kak stacy tembam cakap. dio jumpo abang ashraf ko kek pekan seromban, gi pejabat kadi" uwaaaaa

"aisshhh..akak percayo ko cakap kak stacy tembam tu. dio kan diva propah? lagipun abang ashraf tu kan dah tuo? takdo sapo nak laa akak!" "errr..." sedu kak bunga makin perlahan. "akak dah tanyo kek abang belum ni?" "errr..belom.." "hah, akak.. akak..sungguh emo!kalah kak saripah ani. lenkali keno selidik dulu.tambah2 kalo cerita dari mulut kak stacy tembam. kadang2 10 ayat 2-3 je betol"

kak bungo cinto lestari terdiam. tiada lagi sedu sedan seperti tadi, macam orang mati laki. mungkin kembali rasional (tak yah makan ubat penenang). "terima kasih la milah. maaf yo, tadi akak emo sikit. akak nampak je kool, tapi sebenarnya akak ni emo.kadang2 akak berpikiran singkat" "ehh, takdo masalah akak,lagipun ni maso akak. cumo lenkali akak kenala hati2 sikit. orang ni rambut yo samo hitam, hati lain2. akakpun keno la rasional sikit, kalo nak bandingkan abang ashraf tu..bapak kambing tadi lagi hensem!"

"amboi kutuk laki aku nampak?" "oppsss terlebih sudah!" ok la akak, den nak balik rumah dulu. anak daro cantik cam den tak elok kuar umah lamo2.kang pudar plak kulit den nih terkeno sinar UV. den jalan dulu yo..."

***Courtesy of Abe We~! GREAT thinking bro!!! LOL***

milah duduk bersimpuh dengan ayunya. dia tengah leka melipat kain2 yang bertimbun. sambil melipat, dia menyanyi kecil lagu2 melayu asli. telinganya disumbat dengan ipod apple berkaler merah cili api. tetiba ibunya menegur. "milah, boleh omak cakap sikit kek ekau?". dada milah berdebar2, dag dig dug..didalam dada...(feeling haiza jap). "boleh omak, apo dio?" tanyo milah. "tadi makcik munah datang..errr..." zass! makcik munah?? bakal mertuo aku?? kenapo lak orang tuo tu kemari. nak putuih tunang ko? aisshhh...milah makin gabra. "kenapo mak?" dia cuba mengawal perasaannya.

"hmm dio hantar masak lomak ikan sembilang. pastu gegossip jap. dio bagitau bakal tunang ekau teraso ati dengan kau" "hah?? kenapo lak nak teraso2 hati ni mak? ese takdo buek apo2 salah dongan dio. aisshhh" " alahh, omakpun nak tergolak jugo. tapi kena la respek kat bakal besan. karang guling2 kek situ apo lak dikato kek omak". aisshhh pehal lak ni? omak ni buat den gabra ni. bisik hati milah. aihhh pesal lak tunang den nak emo2 lak nih? aisshhh tak ponah laki sorang tu emo? ado perasaan ko? kato macho, hati batu? kato adik bradik superman?

milah terus berhenti melipat baju. begitu teruja ingin mengetahui apa sebenarnya berlaku. "omak, cakap la kenapo? ese ghisau ni" "rilek la my darling. bendo kocik, tapi ekau keno amik perhatian jugo. kang bondo2 kocik ni yang melarat ni." aiishhh omak jadi drama queen la pulak. ingat ni drama spa Q apo?

"camni hah, tunang ekau tu teraso hati, sobab ko tak kato terima kasih kek dio maso dio belikan cekelat coki2!" terang emaknya dengan penuh senyuman. "lahhhh..ingatkan apo tadi? lerr bukannya bosar bonar kesalahan ese ghuponya. tak kato terimo kasih yo" "iyo, memang la kocik, tapi apdo sesetengah orang bendo tu bosar. bukan susah bonar. dua perkataan yo. terima kasih, kot maleh bonar ko kata yo tq. keno la hargai usaho orang kek kito" "aisshhh tunang ese tu sensitip jugo ghuponyo? keras diluar lembut di dalam?"

"hehe, tu bukan masalahnya milah. yang penting keno appreciate orang" wahh sejak bilo mak den gheti speaking london nih? "bak kato pepatah, yang kurik itu kendi, yang merah itu saga, yang baik itu budi, yang indah itu bahasa. keno la pandai, dah bosar gedabak! orang berbudi kita berbahasa, orang memberi kita merasa" "iyolah mak, lopeh ni ese blaja untuk kato terimo kasih. bukan apo kadang2 ese ni pelupo." "baguslah camtu. kito ni orang timur, penuh dengan adat dan budayo. yang baik keno kekalkan. tambah2 ekau tu perempuan. dah lipat kain tu. omak nak poie masak spagetti bolognaise dengan tuna melt jap. ekau dah bosar...apo2pun..lu pikir la sendiri!"


So... that's the end of it.
My piano had gone with the lorry for disposal.
Mixed feelings collide inside.
A little of sad.
A little of grieve.
A little of disbelieve.
... And a little of relieve.

This is a tribute to my old piano(s).

It was not long ago i bought that piano with a major from my savings. Back in 2003 I've decided to upgrade my Yamaha Studio Upright (that i owned more than 8 years) to Suzuki Digital, just simply because I was so into music composition. Been exposed to piano since I was 10, it had been a part of my life - regardless when I'm happy, when I fall, when I'm angry, falling in love, out of love, feeling bored or content, etc. It's me and my music. I never felt so attached with any other musical instruments other than piano.

My Yamaha Upright was the initial of my every obsession on classical music. From there (and Ms.Cathy - my former piano instructor) I dived into the universe of beautiful classical (like Chopin, Vivaldi, Tchaikovsky, Beethoven, Strauss, Mozart, Brahm, etc) to Disney (the common Whole New World, Beauty and The Beast) to oldies (The Beetles, Love Story, Micheal Learns To Rock, etc) to Pop (Le Ann Rhimes, Savage Garden, Britney Spears), to Malay Pop (Siti, Nora, etc) and lastly to modern classical of Richard Clayderman. To me, among all... nothing outbid classical and for that I enjoyed the most!

Getting Suzuki Digital wasnt much of my first choice. Well, I prefer Yamaha but I changed my mind due it was known for being so freaking expensive. With that amount of money (at the age of 17), I can only afford Suzuki to meet my wonderness. I explored more sound, more creativity... but seriously, the feelings aint the same as playing Upright - just because Upright provide more firm surface. Gotta love for what I paid though.

26th Feb 2006 - Shah Alam had the worst flash flood in history ever! The Suzuki Digital has yet to be 3 years old, but sad to say it had drowned during the mayhem. Few months after the flood I tried to get it fix (even referred to some friends who actually piano expertise) but none say it good.
  1. If I want to get it fix, I need to replace the whole motherboard.
  2. Since it drowned, there are possibility for the piano to collapse in process to move it whereabout.
Damn! Which left me with an end. People have no idea how hard for me to live every day back then. Have you ever felt something part of you been taken out from your life and thus your life became disfuntional in certain ways? That's how I felt. I could feel the pain every time I walked down the stairs and stared at the dead piano in front of me. Even when I was emotionally distraught I had a difficulties to expressed my anxiety to diff channel, thus I started to bang and throw things around, or perhaps break anything I could get in hand. Do you know how hard that was?

Day by day, we moved things around the house. The piano just sit still under the staircase to be an ornament for my mother's pots of flower arrangements. It will soon be forgotten, but its like a burden for me to see every day. What good it posses if it could only sit still being dead while I cannot enjoy playing it anymore? It took me 3 years to make the decision to let it go, and ask a person to dispose the thing (though the person is just a dial away). I learned to let it go.

My mom reminded me something recently, as per quote:
"Mama happy tengok masa Lydia main piano dulu. Even though orang suruh practise 1 jam je, you will practise at least 3 hours a day tanpa disuruh. And masa tu mama tau you happy sangat main piano. Mama pun happy. I think I want to get you a new piano."


P.s: I don't understand how people could once reacted to my piano misery "why don't u get yourself a keyboard then, at least there's something...". Waddaheck?! Trust me, if I buy a keyboard, it will turned me to be some what retard and I will end up slamming the keyboard to wall or crash it into million pieces with a bulldozer! The problem isn't the keyboard, its just me. If I really wanna get a fucking keyboard, I must have gotten it long time ago la!


Initially wanted to make a surprise visit for Ab at his work place last Saturday (after dinner with Zul). Coincidentally I viewed Ab's profile a day before the surprise visit plan, and in the other way round, I'm the one who surprised because Ab is (or perhaps 'was') in top 20 of Akademi Fantasia 7! Fuiyoo, he did it again!

Then on the Saturday I missed Tirai AF7 (I), after came back from dinner I eagerly catch it in youtube.

On Sunday, wah... awal-awal da tunggu depan TV tuh! Excited to see this Mr. Abraham Edwin Dungot in Tirai Akademi Fantasia 7 (II).

And Acis said..."Ab, you did a very very good job. However I am very sad to say... that your journey ends here..."

I was like... waddaheck????!!!!

That's the only thing I can say. Shocking.

First second, Acis were giving him an appraisal, another second he said Ab didnt get thru'. What did just happen there? Am I missing something in between those seconds?

Even my father were sighed "kesian Ab, teringin betul dia nak masuk AF kali ni. tak dapat pulak"

Well, all I can say AF7 really sticks to their "TRANSFORMASI" concept. Though they are dying to have Ab in the academy (can see Pn. Siti Hajar broke down upon Ab's elimination), but you see... by looking back at Ab's music background, I guess the show feels it is much fair giving a way to someone who is much in need of the loophole rather than him. He's already a top 4 in OIAM2, musically trained before and been singing for a quite numerous of year. The only lack on him, he doesn't have an album. Oh wait, I'm not so sure whether he got an album on his Kadazan songs previously or not, but commercially, after his breakthrough in reality tv shows... he got no album. Plus, he ain't need the transformation much. He already have the star quality, its just that he need to be polish a little bit here and there. Unlike the rest of the peeps in AF7 who is still consider as a raw material which will be transformed into a finish product sooner or later.

In other way, I personally think Ab needs a loophole/platform to produce an album and get his name on the chart. And AF7 ain't the loophole he's looking for.

Nevermind, kita cari lagi. I believe it is somewhere, if you tak give up (in God's will) you will find your loophole someday. =)



p.s:
1. Wait a minute. That Adila seems so somewhat familiar....!!!
2. According to Tirai AF7, I don't understand why the peeps like to play with other people's head/hair. Err.. not nice at all.
3. Pakcik, lets go for sushi and pizza later!

This weekend had been officially labeled as the weekend where I ate the most this year (perhaps my whole life). As far as I concern, I never felt even a tiny-tini-hunger this weekend. At some point, I was too bloated.. I felt wanna puke!

Saturday (07/03/09)
I woke up that morning like some what zombie due to the cloudy day and my mom forced me to wake up because my sister got tuition this morning. Thus, we all have to go for kinda early breakky. Chose to eat nasi lemak at Ali's Corner nearby my house, among the nicest nasi lemak I ever had so far. Awesome!

I spared my tummy during lunch by eating mixed vege (my father's set meal side dishes) and a small bowl of soup. The tummy is meant to be spared for the dinner later that day.

Ah yes, the dinner that I'd been waiting for! Since this year I felt so lazy to get Zul, my former uni-classmate, a bday present (I usually have difficulties getting guys a bday present. If he's a girl, i might get her a very cute hair clips instead!) I've decided to treat him for a meal. And he'd been given choices of Teppanyaki or Japanese Buffet, since he kinda likes japanese food. Thus he chose japanese buffet. Around 8.30pm we met at Saisaki Japanese Restaurant is Wisma UOA, KL.


We only can get in about half an hour later because due to the full house. Weekend, what do you expect?


I had couple of sashimi and seafood carbonara in my first plate. Not the best combination but it surely scrumtious! Then I had teppanyaki but totaly forgot to photolog. =.="

The Chawanmushi is oh so yummay~!

Also I had a few more other rounds but it happened to be we were too busy stuffed ourselves, I forgot to photolog again.


Zul heading on sashimi, temaki and udon.

I love Green Tea Ice-Cream! Choc Swirl is nice too~

We left our table at 10.30pm looking like this.

I had too much that night, we went back with a combo of tummy discomfort and a little nausea. We ate like crazy! Hahah.

Ohya, and Zul gave me lollies as a token of appreciation. Aww... thanx bro!


Sunday (08/03/09)
I woke up in a zombie state again today. Mainly because twas still tired upon the day before. And yes, my mom forced me to wake up again since its almost 9am. Therefore I headed to shower and 15mins after that the family headed to Bangsar for breakfast. My father was in crave for banana-leaf chapatti at Nirwana Maju. Going with the flow, I just tagged around. And yet again, it was full house! But fret no more, the guy over there managed to open more tables.

We had vadai before our meals got served. Omg, it was freaking crunchy!

And I had Rawa Thosai this morning. It's been awhile since I last tasted a good Rawa Thosai. Two thumbs up!

My vain sister with her very vain roti telur.

A refreshing mango lassi in the morning... uuuh~!

After breakky we went back to Shah Alam, and I was out again to buy the groceries. I kinda rushed myself as I'm gonna meet May (my bestie) for lunch. Here I go again to Bangsar. Decided to fetch her (since I'm gonna past by her housing area) and headed to Bangsar Village at 2pm.

Uuuh.. sexay Ferrari~!

I never been to Bangsar Village before. And I been long time wanna tried Delicious since I heard many good response from my peers (and my mom!). So, we decided to checked out Delicious for lunch.


Luckily we got one final table that very minute. If we're late by few minutes we might need to wait for the next table to get lost. =p Oooh..! Felt like trying everything but the tummy and the cash aint that big to cater everything. Thus me and May decided to make today a sinful one.

Death by Iced Chocolate. Oh wow... sinful pleasure version 1.0!

Smoked Salmon Quiche, so addictive~!

Carbonara Spaghettini with Wild Mushroom, Beef Bacon, Oregano and Cream... yumma! Sinful pleasure version 2.0!

We stop before ordering the dessert. Yeah, it was a pretty heavy lunch I must say. So we decided to get our bumps out off the place and just sight-seeing Bangsar Village before heading for dessert. And.. thank you May-o for the fabulous lunch! (next outing is gonna be on my treat)

Spotted this very cute nail spa. Owned by Soong Ai Ling. =)

Sewel-ness after heavy lunch.

After spent 1.5 hours of window shopping, we extend our sinful pleasure at Starbucks plus more chit-chatty!

Choc eclair.. sinful pleasure version 3.0.


Banana choc chip muffin..! Sinful pleasure version 4.0!

May-o reluctant to have the last eclair as she's too full.

Can't imagine we actually wanted to form a rock band ala LP girl version back in highschool


Heading home

We get retarded after over dose on Chocs today.

I came home at 7pm with a very full tummy. Chilled at home for like half an hour and went out again since decided to accompany my parents for dinner. I only had mineral water with few sips of Mi Bandung Muar's gravy. I cant eat no more!

Daddy too focus on his dinner, and the Mi Bandung is actually his.

As a conclusion, I ate too much this weekend which leads to much hunger for next one week. And... delicious is officially in my list of my fave place. =)

Monday (09/03/09)
I thought my gastrointestinal journey will end there. But I was wrong, this morning my mom asked me to get some stuff at IKEA. Hurm.. IKEA... having lunch at IKEA is consider mandatory! And yeah, my sister 'ketuk' me 'cukup-cukup' today!

We had Beef Balls, BBQ Chic Wings, Gravad Lax (smoked salmon) and some buttercake sugar glaze dessert.

nom-nom Gravad Lax~!

I'm so gonna have only baked fish tonight for dinner. That's it! My gastro journey ends here this week.

Attempted to come out with a political post last week but decided to call it off because i was lack of vocabs to filled in, pretty much because I had mixed feelings through out the whole week.. thus my mind was as solitary as my soul. My intention of publishing my own comments or p.o.v on the political scene here in Malaysia had been warned by my father - one wrong step/phrase, i might be arrested by I.S.A. I reckon it is not worth it, might as well I sit quietly watching the political epic and laugh out loud like no one cares. Seriously, it is so epic... it look more like a huge joke now.

Leaving the epic behind, I get hold to my life which it seems not much exciting these days. Yea, I had fun most of the time, but it ain't excites me much. The fun seems to feel so... blunt. Where the spark gone?

I found out many some sort of superhuman comic movies are conquering the cinema these days. I'm not much of a movie junkie, as per known by many people. But... damn, I really need to find some time to go to the cinema as I eagerly wanna do marathon on these 3 movies:




And since I am so used to it, I dont mind watching them alone. I think its a perfect idea for me to get intact with my own childhood memories. (love it!)

I also get intact with my fellow ex-sktp-ians these days, in facebook that is. I found (or they found me, actually) 15 of the 3 Intan '95 alumni and we're all excited for the reunion in the making. It's been 14 years... perhaps if we can get more people and get in touch with Pn.Adeda, the reunion is so gonna ON!


Oops! I did it again! Due to my over curiosity i found out... that 'dude' is married! So much for 'fly me to the moon' momentos. Hahhaha. Its a good thing I guess. If its not because of my curiosity, I might still drooling on a married man! (once upon a time i quoted 'Curiosity Kills' and now i wonder 'am I gonna die in my own curiosity someday?') Next!

Here I would like to take this opportunity to congratulate Maciej Pilarczyk, my really really really long time mate (yea, we sorta know each other since.. what? i was 14?), who had just got engaged recently. Sad that I only knew this from Adam (the brother), and not from the yours truely himself. Perhaps he got his own reason to keep it low. Anyhow, massive congrats to Mak n his fiancee! Cheers!

No... he DID NOT got engaged to Lucia, the cat!

Just a quick one on the music act. I have to admit that I recently slowing myself from the music scene due to my commitments with the work and the family (plus catching up with my own personal life). But it ain't a valid reason not to support my fellow friends.

Congratz to Imran Ajmain for the release of his 2nd single - Jika Engkau Pergi, which also the theme song of new Samarinda's slot 'Yusuff'. The song is superb, I still cannot get the orchestra off my head. Thus, kudos to u - Imran, and Sulu Sarawak. 5 thumbs up!

Also best of luck to Pop Shuvit for their new single Oh! Sizuka which will release on 11th March 2009. Oh my... I miss u guys to the bits! Now u guys got all brand new streetteam proteges to replace me but anyhow I will drop by at the scene once in a while. I hope this new single will rock, like you guys always do. Gambatte!!!

P.S:

1. If I'm rich enough, i might get Imran Ajmain and Afgan theirselves to serenades me every night till I soundly asleep. But since much of crazy dreams like this is so crazy, till God might also think He'll be crazy if approve such crazy wishes like this... this is why human invented radio, CDs and ipod. And also handphones equiped with media player!

2. Still waiting for the relaunching of 21:05 Productions. =p